Rediscovering Domesticity and decided to post my own list.
These are things I have actually said and most of them were pretty recent.
"No, you don't need to smell your brother's poop because I am sure it's poop." (to my 4 year old)
"Get off your brother, he does not like when you sit on his head." (to my 4 year old)
"Do not bite that lady's leg! She is not food!" (to my 17 month old)
"Please don't lick the window. I will give you a wet paper towel to clean it because spit doesn't really clean." (to both of them)
"Stop putting cars in the fish tank. Fish don't drive." (to both of them at one time or another)
"Poop or pee?" (I ask my 4 year old this daily. He now asks me when we are in public restrooms. It is now a habit even though I really don't care anymore, haha.)
"Do not whack him with that carrot! Carrots are not swords." (to my 4 year old, I have also said that sentence about celery and french fries.)
What have you said to your kids that made you wish for adult conversation?